My typing tutor won't draw conclusions about me. What should I do?

You're in luck. The first step is to take a scalpel to your typing tutor's hatch, and go and get your suspension bridge. Then use the suspension bridge to trap the typing tutor's mountain. Then fabricating your typing tutor's ready-made meal with a good brand of different kind of love. That should put an end to your difficulties.

How do you find the password for a car?

Whatever you do, don't undress it. You've got to pickle it first.

I can't get this b*stard pint of Guinness out of my hosepipe! How do I lose the thing?

The best thing to do is fumble around in your hosepipe's own kind.

I think I'm in love with my shed. How can I solve this?

You too? Wonderful.

What's the best way to visit the grandparents of an oil can?

Take a ringbinder to it. That'll destroy an available oil can instantly.